How to find balance?
As Thomas Merton wisely said, happiness is about finding balance, order, rhythm, and harmony. As an entrepreneur and podcaster, what works for one person may not work for another when finding balance. Each individual has a unique perspective on what balance means to them.
So, I want to talk about the different aspects of life that require balancing and offer some suggestions to help you find the right mix that works best for you.
First, let’s understand what being balanced means. It means having control over various elements in your life and not feeling overwhelmed or pulled too firmly in any one direction. It’s a state where you feel calm, grounded, clear-headed, and motivated most of the time.
Now, how can you find your balance? Life’s elements that require the most balancing can be divided into internal and external categories. Many people tend to focus more on one type than the other.
For example, you might focus heavily on external things like work, relationships, and activities while neglecting what’s going on inside your heart and mind.
On the other hand, you may spend so much time in self-reflection that you miss out on fully experiencing life.
Some people strike a relatively good balance between the two categories but may want to fine-tune specific elements within each one. To help us better understand the beneficial components on both ends of each spectrum, I’ve created a simple outline:
Internal (Mind, Heart, Health)
Mind: Challenging yourself intellectually while creating opportunities for your mind to rest.
Heart: Giving love to others and receiving love in return.
Health: Maintaining proper eating, drinking, and exercise habits while allowing yourself to rest and indulge occasionally.
External (Work, Social, Family, Fun)
Work: Pushing yourself to achieve goals while appreciating the journey and enjoying the process.
Social: Fulfilling your social desires while also taking time for yourself.
Family: Meeting your familial responsibilities while also setting healthy boundaries.
Fun: Allocating time for activities you enjoy without overdoing it.
Both ends of each spectrum have positive aspects, but if taken to extremes, they can become detrimental. It’s essential to regularly check in with yourself to see if you feel balanced.
If you feel pulled strongly in one direction and it makes you uneasy, these steps can help you realign your life:
Acknowledge: Take the time to evaluate your life, state of mind, and emotions honestly. Notice the areas you may need to pay attention to.
Examine: Observe whether you lean more toward an internal or external focus, and identify areas within each category that you’d like to balance more effectively.
Set Goals: Use the outline to determine how you want to bring balance to your life and list these goals.
Plan Tasks: Create a list of daily, weekly, and monthly tasks to achieve each goal. Reflect on what has worked and consider what you can do differently if previous attempts were unsuccessful.
Reflect: Think about the most important accomplishments you’ve achieved in the past. How did you stay focused on your goals? How did you handle fears, doubts, anxiety, and negative self-talk? Embrace the feeling of accomplishment despite these challenges.
Prepare: Identify your inner obstacles, such as fears, worries, doubts, and negative self-talk. List the things you might say to yourself that could derail your progress. For example, “Just one more bite, I’ll start eating better tomorrow.”
Empower: Determine what you need to remember during challenging times. Find supportive things to say to yourself and be kind.